I wish my true love would return to me and love me like he used to!

My true wish would be to be back in a relationship with my ex. We have been split up for 2 years now, but we had been together for nearly 4 years.
Emotionally I was going through a bad patch due to family problems and I was suffering with depression.
Due to depression I became very distant from my ex and felt very detached from him. I was hospitalised for a while to get help for my depression. When I came out of hospital I ended our relationship. I am not sure why I did that....I was just so confused and I suppose not thinking straight. It was if I felt numb and had no feelings for anyone.
He wanted us to try again and stayed in touch hoping I would go back to him. But I pushed him away and told him to move on. Unfortunately he did move on!!!
He has been dating someone for the past 8 months and as far as I know they are happy. However I have recently become my old self again. I have been treated for depression and I can now say that after 2 years I am finally free of it.
However, because I am free of it, the love for my ex has returned, stronger than ever. I know he is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I have told him this and apologised for finishing it with him and tried to explain why I did it. I think he understands but he says I hurt him too much and he doesn't think he can trust that I won't break his heart again. He told me he still loves me, but that I hurt him too badly. He says that he doesn't love his new girlfriend but she is a solid charachter so he is going to try and make it work.
This makes me so sad, it also makes me sad that I can't just be happy with him and it makes me sad that I want to split them up so I can have him back. Surely that is horrible????? but the trouble is, I love him so much and I know he loves me. I was ill when I ended it and was not in a fit state to make any long term plans...I made a big mistake.
I love him so much, he is my soul mate...without him by life is nothing!!!
This is my wish...to have the love of my life back as my boyfriend...the problem is, I don't think it will happen...I just wish, hope and pray that it will!!! I can make him happy and I know he will make me happy! This is my wish.....

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